\u00a0<\/p>\n
At the end of my teenage years, I was unsettled.\u00a0 I was bored and had no idea what I would do with the rest of my life. Then one day, I saw a video. Join Starfleet. See the Galaxy. Meet interesting Aliens. That sounded right up my alley, so on a whim, I joined up.\u00a0 I would return a Captain, chest covered in medals and dripping glory.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n The next few years were interesting. I moved to San Francisco and attended Starfleet Academy, where I suppose the best thing you could say was, \u201csomeone has to be in the bottom third of the class\u201d.\u00a0 I was not a resounding success as a cadet. I am pretty sure, looking back, that if Starfleet had not lost so many personnel to the Dominion War, I might not have squeaked by. But hey, if you\u2019re in the bottom third of the class at medical school, you still get called Doctor.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n As I was starting my third year at the Academy, it was time for me to pick my branch – to establish where my training would be focused, and so I was required to meet with my Career Councillor, Lieutenant Commander Philbin.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n I entered his office and paused.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cHave a seat, Cadet Underall.\u201d He gestured to a chair.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cThank you, Sir.\u201d I sat down and waited as he studied his PADD.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYou have a checkered history here at the Academy, Underall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t know what you mean, Sir.\u201d I smiled at him, non-committal.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYou blew out an EPS conduit in the barracks with your hair dryer. No power for two days.\u201d He read without looking up.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cThat was never proven, Sir,\u201d I replied. \u201cIt could have been anyone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cDo you recall your class escape room simulation, Underall? When your team was placed in a simulated Romulan bioweapons lab? Your team had to work together to solve a series of puzzles to prevent a plague from being released.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cOh, yes, Sir.\u00a0 My team did well on that one.\u201d I smiled at him brightly.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cUnderall, you smashed a beaker, held a piece of jagged glass to the instructor\u2019s throat, and told him if he didn\u2019t open the door, you would kill him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYes, Sir. They told us to think outside the box. Set a new Academy record too. Eight point two seconds.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Commander Philbin closed his eyes, almost as if he was in pain, then tapped his PADD to scroll the page. \u201cDid you really reply to the question `Who are the Cardassian Union\u2019 on your alien culture final with \u201cThey are the people who make sure Cardassian workers get safe working conditions, a pension plan, and paid extra when they work overtime?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cSeems self-evident, Sir.\u201d I wasn\u2019t sure what the problem was.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Philbin set down the PADD. \u201cWe are here to discuss your future Lacy, to select your career path in Starfleet, and to help you be a successful officer.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYes, Sir.\u201d I agreed.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cHave you thought about what branch you would like to be in, Lacy?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cI thought science, Sir,\u201d I offered.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t think so, Lacy.\u00a0 You failed theoretical calculus. Three times.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n I bit my lower lip. \u201cMathing is really hard, Sir.\u201d\u00a0 I paused. \u201cMaybe medical?\u201d I always liked playing doctor.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Commander Philbin sighed and looked at his PADD again. \u201cIn your first aid course, you put a tourniquet on a Ferengi cadet\u2019s ear. He had to go to sick bay for treatment.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cSo no medical then?\u201d I replied, sulking.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cI think not.\u201d Philbin glanced at his PADD again.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cEngineering?\u201d I suggested.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cEPS conduit. Hair dryer.\u201d Was his reply.\u00a0 \u201cI don\u2019t think so.\u201d He looked up and made eye contact. \u201cHow about marines?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cOh, hell no!\u201d I replied to that suggestion loudly.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n The vigour of my response seemed to stir his interest. \u201cWhy not?\u201d He asked curiously.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cLook, I wouldn\u2019t mind the screaming booyah all the time, but they march everywhere. And when they are not marching, they are running. I want to join part of Starfleet, which gets to ride around. I am not built for running.\u201d I complained.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Philbin glanced over, taking in my tight-fitting cadet uniform without comment.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cOkay, Lacy, how do you feel about handcuffs?\u201d He finally asked.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n I looked at him suspiciously. \u201cI can take them or leave them. Usually, I get drinks and dinner.\u201d Was he asking me out?\u00a0 He was a little old for me, but hey, it could work. I glanced at his hand, looking for a ring.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cHow would you feel about joining the Starfleet Security branch?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n It was my turn to blink. \u201cSecurity?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYes,\u201d he said enthusiastically, \u201cI think you might be very well suited to being a security officer. Security is full of opportunities for a young officer such as yourself. There is lots of potential for advancement.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n “When other security officers are turned into jelly, dismembered, or otherwise die horribly it leaves a vacancy, you mean?” I asked him. I watch the news. I know stuff.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n “They don’t all die horribly,” He snapped at me. “I don’t know where people get these ideas.”\u00a0 He paused. “Some get pensioned off with missing limbs or permanent brain damage.”<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n \u201cYou are not reassuring me, Sir.\u201d I chewed on my lip again.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n Commander Philbin shrugged, \u201cIt\u2019s either this or the marching while yelling booyah, Lacy. You don\u2019t have many options.\u201d He brightened, \u201cYou can resign and go back to Chicago.\u201d For some reason, he seemed to find that a great idea.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n I sighed, \u201cSecurity it is, Sir.\u201d At least they got to ride in ships, I rationalized. \u201cSign me up.\u201d\u00a0 I fancied I might look good in an eye patch or wearing one of those visor things.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n And so I joined Starfleet Security and graduated as an Ensign, ready to explore the galaxy and meet interesting aliens. I discovered it was theoretically possible that someday I could be Captain of a Federation Starship.\u00a0 It turns out that the Starfleet officer who flies the radioactive waste ship is called Captain. Who knew?<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n And so, the adventure begins.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/p>\n End Personal Log<\/span><\/p><\/p>\n
